There’s nothing quite as heartbreaking in a relationship as doubting a partner’s loyalty.
We usually get a gut feeling, and the sad thing is, that feeling is often right.
However, if you’re suspecting your man might be talking to another woman, you can’t base your doubts on a gut feeling alone.
There are other ways to tell if he’s texting another girl—more solid clues that hint at his unfaithfulness.
I’m going to show you those exact ways: signs he is texting someone else!
1. He’s always on his phone lately.
A sudden behavior change is perhaps the most obvious sign of this situation.
If your man has started talking to another woman, his screen time has most likely suddenly increased.
I’m talking about him staying on his phone for an inappropriate amount of time.
He just got home from work? The first thing he does is check his phone.
You two are hanging out together? Again, he’s on his phone.
He always spends his free time on his phone—this leads us to believe someone is inspiring his newfound habit.
There may be someone he desperately wants to talk to, but to do that, he needs to spend the majority of his time on his phone.
2. You found him on dating sites.
Whether you used Swindlerbuster or other options, finding him on dating apps is not a good sign.
If he’s on dating apps or sites, then he’s very likely to be texting other women.
We’re not talking about just one woman, we’re talking about a number of them.
Dating sites offer a wide range of opportunities to reach out to people and form connections.
If you find out he’s on dating sites then there’s a huge sign he’s texting another woman.
3. He’s gradually becoming more aloof with you.
Lately, you’ve noticed that he’s become distant, cold, and disinterested.
He’s not as affectionate as he used to be, and he’s impossible to get a hold of.
He’s always canceling your plans and has no justifiable excuse for it; his behavior has noticeably changed.
When people do something they know they’re not supposed to do, they act a certain way—sudden detachment is one of those ways.
Their change of behavior is usually linked with something more serious, say, a loss of feelings, guilt, and/or other factors.
4. He always seems to be preoccupied.
He’s always distracted lately and pays almost no attention to his surroundings—including you.
He’s always doing something or telling you he’s busy, and whether he actually is or not, him constantly making this excuse is suspicious.
For the life of you, you just can’t seem to spend some proper time with him because he’s always turning your offers down.
A decreased amount of time spent together is usually a negative sign, especially if it’s been happening a lot recently.
And even more, if it’s linked to his phone.
5. His accounts and devices suddenly have passwords.
In a relationship, it’s fairly common for people to share passwords or get rid of them completely.
It’s the modern-age way of letting a significant other know you’re serious and trustworthy.
If your man has suddenly locked everything with a password, chances are he’s done it because he’s talking to someone else and doesn’t want you to know.
He’s changed his mobile passcode or other devices and socials.
That, or he suddenly felt the need to put passwords for everything.
This is all very suspicious behavior that leads us to believe a partner is hiding something—or someone.
6. He doesn’t post or mention you anywhere.
Another very huge, red flag in relationships is a person not posting or even mentioning their partner on their socials.
If your man doesn’t post you or stopped posting you, he may not want people to know he’s in a relationship.
That would greatly ruin his chances of talking to other women or would chase another woman he’s interested in away.
If, for example, he’s started texting another woman, chances are that he won’t mention the fact that he’s not single.
Chances also are that he won’t post pictures of you two together because that would blow his cover.
He also won’t interact with you or your posts; in some cases, people even delete all interactions (e.g. likes, comments, shares, mentions, etc).
7. His friends have started acting awkward around you.
And that’s because they know what he’s up to.
We usually share stuff with our closest friends—even stuff we’re not too proud of.
So, I wouldn’t be surprised if your partner told his buddies that he’s talking to another woman and double-timing you.
Knowing that, whenever you, him, and his friends hang out, they act super awkward and uncomfortable around you.
That’s because they can’t act normal knowing he’s treating you unfairly.
Granted, some people don’t care about their friends’ wrongdoings, others’ conscience slips up and manifests itself through awkward behavior.
8. He clears his texts, conversations, and/or browser history.
If you’ve noticed that your guy always clears his messages, conversations, history, and anything to erase his tracks, that’s not a good sign.
When we think about it, after we get done talking to, say, a friend, a relative, or other people normally, we don’t feel the need to erase our conversations.
Hence, deleting his messages is suspicious.
He’s doing it because he doesn’t want you to see any potentially inappropriate texts with other people.
Absolutely no other explanation comes to mind.
He could be deleting clues because he doesn’t want you to find out who he’s texting.
He knows there’s a chance you could somehow check his phone and stumble across his unfaithful behavior.
9. He reacts negatively whenever asked about it.
If you’re thinking of confronting him about your suspicions, observe his reaction closely.
And if you already have, a negative and harsh reaction doesn’t look good on his part. If he’s guilty he might
- get angry;
- act defensively;
- try guilt-tripping you;
- start panicking;
- get really silent.
Whether you simply asked if there’s someone else he’s talking to, or if you saw a notification from a stranger, bringing the topic even remotely up will make him panic.
His guilt is showing through his behavior; he tries to change or disregard the topic out of discomfort.
It’s human nature really: we don’t want to stay on the topic of something that makes us uncomfortable. And when forced to do so, we’re all over the place.
10. He never leaves his phone unattended anymore.
No matter where he is and what he’s doing, one thing is for sure: he always has his phone with him.
He’s being extra careful to not leave you any openings to check it or see any notifications or calls.
He doesn’t leave it in places other than his pockets, under his pillow while he’s sleeping, or anywhere near him, really.
Faithful people in relationships feel much more comfortable leaving their phones unattended around their partners—that’s how it’s supposed to be.
But, if your man is treating his phone like a child, you should look a bit more into it.
11. You catch him having way too much fun with his phone.
Even more, than he does with you.
Do you know the annoying and gut-wrenching feeling of catching your partner giggling while texting with someone?
This is similar to that, but it’s gotten out of hand.
If your partner is always having the time of his life when using his phone, but not with you, then that’s suspicious behavior.
Although he may be texting his friends or even watching funny videos, what are the chances he’s doing that every single time?
Very slim—we can’t brush consistency in negative behavior off as a coincidence.
Especially not if it’s that obvious to the point it has you wondering.
12. His phone is always facing away from you.
An unfaithful partner who’s cheating through his phone will never let his screen face you.
Whenever he’s texting someone, he tilts his phone away from you to keep it out of your sight.
And whenever you two go out, he keeps his phone facing down.
He does this because he doesn’t want you to see his screen.
A call or text from the person he’s talking to could pop up, and he doesn’t want you to see.
He’s hiding the most crucial evidence—the phone itself.
13. He has his notifications turned off.
Another dead giveaway that tells you he’s texting another girl!
As we know, social media platforms offer to enable notifications to see promptly that others have interacted with us (e.g. texts, likes, calls. comments, mentions, adds, etc).
So, whenever another person texts us, we get notified.
Now, normally, this isn’t a big deal, and if your partner thinks it is, then he’s possibly trying to hide someone.
Chances are he has his notifications off because he doesn’t want you to see who’s texting and calling him.
No assumptions should be made just yet, however, a partner having his notifications disabled is grounds for suspicion.
14. You notice new women on his friend list.
If he’s constantly adding women you don’t know and have never met on his socials, I don’t blame you for being suspicious.
It’s normal for people to have friends from the opposite gender, however, things start getting suspicious once we realize we don’t know those people.
They’ve never been introduced or even mentioned to us, so it makes us wonder:
“How does my partner know this person? And why have I never been told about them?”
The most feasible explanation, in this case, would be that he’s texting other women.
Not friends, co-workers, or people he knows in his daily life.
I’m talking about strangers he doesn’t want you to meet for a reason.
15. He often calls you another woman’s name.
This is an especially aggravating one—if your partner has a habit of mixing your name up with another woman’s, it’s time we consider the possibility he’s talking to someone else.
Mistakes can happen once in a while, but that’s not what I’m talking about.
I’m talking about him constantly calling you by another name, online and offline.
If his keyboard often auto-corrects to another woman’s name, that’s quite worrying as how this works is that keyboards learn from people’s texting habits.
Meaning that for that to constantly happen, he would have to use a specific word often—the name of the person he’s texting.
16. He never answers his calls when he’s with you.
He never answers his calls in front of you; he either leaves the room, declines it, or lets it ring.
“Oh, it’s just a friend, haha.”
“It’s nothing important. I don’t need to take it right now.”
“Probably just scam callers.”
And that’s suspicious—especially if it happens too often.
If he’s texting another woman, chances are they call too, however, because he’s trying to balance those two parts of his life, she doesn’t know when’s a good time and when’s not.
Especially if she doesn’t know he’s in a relationship either.
Whenever he gets a call, he sees who it is and tries lying about it, making it seem no one suspicious is calling.
17. He refuses to give you his phone.
Because of how common cheating through text is, part of building trust in a relationship is the ability to share devices without sweating it.
However, this is not the case with you and your partner.
If he refuses to give you his phone even if you need it, it could be because he doesn’t want you snooping around.
He knows if he does so, you could find out something he’s been desperately trying to hide.
And in relationships, it’s usually another person.
Being overly stingy with one’s phone is a huge, red flag and usually an indicator that a partner is hiding something.
18. He delays his replies.
Another indication a partner is texting someone else is that they’re gradually delaying their replies more and more.
He takes forever to text back, and when he finally does, he disappears again.
A lack of communication is usually really concerning, considering the fact it’s one of the pillars of a relationship.
Communication is key, always, and when it’s not treated as such, there’s usually a reason for that.
He may be delaying his texts because he’s distracted.
He’s bad at multitasking and can’t pay attention to two people at the same time.
If this issue is becoming increasingly bigger each day, it could be that he’s talking to someone else on the side and can’t give you his full time.
19. He’s always checking his phone for texts.
He always checks his phone and is giddy about getting a text from a specific person.
Whenever a notification pops up, he immediately checks to see if it’s a specific one.
Anxiously waiting for a reply from someone is a sign that a person is harboring deeper feelings for that specific someone.
And when we think about it, it makes sense.
Whenever we’re on a talking stage with someone we like, we can’t contain the excitement and can barely wait for a text back.
If your man exhibits similar behavior, it could be he’s welcoming another person into his life.
20. He often brings up things you don’t remember—a mix-up.
By this, I mean he brings up stuff he thought he did with you, but in fact, didn’t.
He did them with the other person and forgot about it.
Say, he follows up on a story he thought he told you, but you don’t remember it, and says something like, “Do you remember how I was telling you about…”
And if you’re confused about it and don’t recall anything, it’s possible you weren’t the person he told the story to.
Granted, he could’ve told that to anyone, that doesn’t necessarily apply to romantic topics.
For example, him saying something like, “That dress you showed me looked so good, baby.” when you haven’t shown him any dresses lately, it is suspicious.
Pay close attention to his habits and tendencies!
What to do if your man is texting another woman?
Finding out that a partner has been talking to another woman is heartbreaking—where do we even go from here?
Maybe, all you want to do is lash out and cuss him out, or text the other woman and give her a piece of your mind.
However, that is not the way—at least not at first.
For our sake, we should take a deep breath, and think about what we need to do to make ourselves at peace.
And for that reason, I’m going to show you what to do after catching your man texting someone else.
- Take a deep breath and consider the possibilities. Think about the excusable reasons why he’s texting that specific person.
- Make it known what that means for the two of you and that you won’t let yourself be disrespected. Speak your mind while being the mature one.
- Take how he reacts at face value; sometimes, people’s reactions reveal more than their words.
Shifting the blame, anger, panic, lying, denying, etc. usually indicate something negative, perhaps, his cheating tendencies.
- Re-establish your boundaries and make them clear to them.
- Think about whether you want to give him another chance.
Don’t ever accommodate disrespect.
Don’t get used to disrespect and discomfort, especially if they’re coming from a significant other.
They are never, and I repeat, NEVER supposed to make you purposely feel negative emotions.
If they’re okay with putting your relationship at risk, it shows a lack of care.
You deserve more, don’t settle for less.