Words cannot describe the feeling of finding out that you’ve been cheated on by the one person you poured all your love, care, and time into.
It’s truly one of the most heartbreaking experiences, however, eventually, we’re going to have to confront the cheater about it.
If you’re going through a similar experience, keep in mind that what you say to the cheater will greatly impact the two of you.
If you’re contemplating what you should say to your cheating boyfriend, here are some tips and examples to help you along the way:
1. Choose the right approach when messaging him.
Do you want to come off as:
- Or genuine?
Now, I’m not going to influence your way of doing things because you should tackle the situation in the way you deem best!
However, keep in mind that having a calmer approach could benefit you in more ways; it will help you get the closure you need.
It might also make your boyfriend feel more inclined to answer your questions and regret doing what he did.
And if not that, it will help you look like the mature one here; with enough luck, your indifference might even shatter his ego.
The point is, before sending any messages to the cheater, it helps to have a clear idea of what your approach is and how it will make things play out!
2. Think about what you’re hoping to achieve by the end of your discussion.
Think about what your goal is.
Do you want to break up with him, or give him another chance?
Whichever one, your text should contain exactly what it needs!
For example, if you want to break up with him, the text should make that clear—on the other hand, if not, your text should convey just that.
Think about what you want and how your words will help you achieve your goal.
3. Leave nothing unsaid: express your thoughts and feelings.
Now, don’t get me wrong—just because I said a calmer approach may be the best doesn’t mean that we have to bite our tongue!
For the sake of not having any regrets later on, tell him about how his actions made you feel and how they’ve changed your opinion of him.
You’re probably feeling heartbroken, disappointed, or even furious, so why let him get away with it? Give him a piece of your mind.
Trust me, you don’t want to spend your healing days thinking, “I should have said this instead of that!”
4. Don’t be vague either.
Don’t sugarcoat things for him—your thoughts, feelings, and decisions need to be communicated as they are!
If you want to break up with him, don’t make him think there’s any hope that the two of you will ever get back together again.
Why spare him his feelings when he didn’t spare yours? Besides, being upfront will show him that you’re serious and that he screwed up big time.
Ignorance is bliss, so don’t let him feel blissful.
5. Don’t excuse his behavior, not even for one second.
What strong enough reason did he have to cheat on you? Probably none.
We need to understand that cheating isn’t obligatory, it’s optional—he chose to cheat on you knowing well what it meant.
He might claim that, for example, texting another person is no big deal.
He might blame it on himself—the tough time he’s going through or that that’s just the way he is.
Or he might even have the audacity to blame you, saying you acted a certain way that pushed him to cheat.
Don’t fall for these lame, cliché excuses—cheaters will say literally anything to save face.
6. Don’t believe his lies.
A cheater classic: lying about what happened.
“She initiated everything!” “It was a drunken mistake!”
These are only a couple of classic examples of what a cheater might say when confronted.
As I said, he’s trying to save face, so, of course, he’ll lie about what happened—the truth (that he willingly cheated) won’t look good for him.
Don’t believe any of his lies, that’s all they are.
7. Think about whether you should forgive him or not!
Before giving him a second chance, decide whether he deserves it or not.
- He’s cheated on you multiple times, but doesn’t leave;
- What he did changed your life for the worse;
- He had a negative impact on your health;
- You know that letting him go will benefit you in the future;
- You’re slowly starting to resent him;
- You’re ashamed of telling people you’re still together.
If you tick any of these boxes, know that you’ve had enough of forgiving his cheating behavior.
It may seem impossible at the moment, but you can find the strength to let go of him; it’s going to hurt for a while, but it’s for the best.
8. If you want to leave, you can do it abruptly or subtly.
Usually, I recommend not abruptly leaving a cheater without saying a word—not for the cheater’s sake, but for yours.
Take it from me: the only way I was able to fully move on from my cheating partner was to have one final conversation with him.
It was like I removed a huge weight off my chest—spending every day regretting not giving him a piece of my mind really did a number on me.
However, everybody copes with cheating in different ways, and if suddenly leaving is what gives you peace of mind, that’s okay too!
I understand the feeling of not wanting to give a cheater the pleasure of closure; leaving them to worry is satisfying in its own way.
9. If you’ve made the decision to break up, say goodbye for good.
You already know that you want to end the relationship—all that’s left is to say goodbye to your cheating boyfriend.
And that’s exactly what needs to be done next.
Tell him that you have no intention to continue being his partner; he’s hurt you way too much for that.
To do that, you can choose to cut him out of your life for good by blocking his socials, phone number, and any other way he can contact you.
Cheaters tend to crawl their way back into your life one way or another—don’t give them any opportunities!
What to say to a cheating boyfriend to make him feel bad? 50 perfect examples to convey how you feel:
1. “When I found out what you had done, I honestly didn’t want to believe it. It’s all clear now what type of person you are. This is so disappointing. I’m breaking up with you. Please don’t ever contact me again.”
2. “I don’t know who’s stupider, me for trusting you, or you for thinking that I wouldn’t find out. It’s over, don’t talk to me again.”
3. “In all honesty, I can’t forgive you for what you’ve done. I’ve never been hurt this way, and staying with you means that I’d have to get used to this pain. I’m putting an end to us, and there’s no way you can change my mind.”
4. “Well, if it isn’t the world’s greatest self-proclaimed “playboy”. I feel so stupid having trusted someone who couldn’t even bother deleting his text messages. Do me a favor and forget about me. It’s over.”
5. “I trusted you. You’re the only person I trusted and loved, yet you go behind my back and do this?! I want nothing more to do with you. It’s over, [his name], don’t even think of showing yourself in front of me again.”
6. “Did you seriously think that saying ‘I’m sorry’ would be enough for me to forgive you? I feel insulted. You were the only guy who I put all my love and trust into. You were my safe space, but you ruined it all. Stay away from me.”
7. “I’m low-key glad you cheated on me. You saved me from wasting any more time with you.”
8. “All this time we’ve been together, and you decided to throw it all away for 2 minutes of pleasure? What a joke. You disgust me. You’ll never hear from me nor see me ever again.”
9. “This is like a bad dream I’m hoping to wake up from, but no, this actually happened. I can’t believe it. Never in my life have I ever done anything to hurt you. I loved you too much for that, yet you cheated on me.”
10. “This is terrible. How did it happen? Were there others, too? I bet there were, I can’t ever trust you again. How could you do this to us?”
11. “I can’t even look at you. I thought of you as someone who would never ever hurt me. I was stupid to trust you. I don’t want to ever see you again.”
12. “This is the last straw for our relationship. I’ve tried my hardest to forgive you because I thought you were the one. But I guess the one wouldn’t have treated me this way. Lose my number and everything else having to do with me. It’s over, [his name].”
13. “I’m not even going to bother hearing your stupid excuses. You cheated on me, and that can never be changed. It’s over.”
14. “I’m done trying to keep you in check. I spend every day paranoid that you’ll cheat again, and I’m sick of it. Go find another person whose life you can ruin, because it’s not about to be me. Goodbye.”
15. “I’m done putting up with you. Go make another woman miserable. Goodbye.”
16. “I can’t believe this. Is there any reason why you cheated on me? Would all hell break lose if you didn’t grind against another person? What a joke. Don’t show your face to me again.”
17. “You were the only guy I’ve ever welcomed in my life this way. Being with you was the highlight of my day, I feel so stupid. You don’t exist to me anymore.”
18. “Did you think you were some sort of genius and I wouldn’t find out you’ve been doing [his side piece]?🤣🤣 That’s so disappointing. We’re done [his name]!”
19. “I pity the next person who has to deal with your sorry self. Don’t text me again.”
20. “I’m speechless. You were the one person in the world I never expected this from. This is not how you treat people you love. I’m disgusted.”
21. “It’s crazy how you expect me to forgive you. You chose to cheat on me, and now you’re bawling? No, this is unacceptable. We’re done.”
22. “I’ve made my decision, and I don’t want you to fight me on it. I’m breaking up with you. The pain you made me feel is unforgivable and I won’t be able to trust you again. I wish you nothing but the best, but this isn’t going to work out.”
23. “I regret having met you. Had I known you’re this type of guy, I wouldn’t have ever even breathed your direction, let alone date you. You’re dead to me.”
24. “Oh and by the way, you’re single now. Because there’s no way in hell I’m wasting my time on you.”
25. “Can you not tell anybody that we dated? I’m embarrassed to have trusted you. Lose my number.”
24. Send him the proof you have of him cheating and say something like, “Looks like somebody was having fun last night. It’s over, don’t bother me again.”
25. “It’s over between us.”
26. “This is unbelievable. I’m actually shocked, I never expected this from you. I never want to see you again.”
27. “I’m sick of you disrespecting me this way. I’ve never once done anything close to cheating because I only had eyes for you, but you obviously are too immature to understand. I’m moving on.”
28. “I found out you cheated on me. I’m not too into games. Wish you all the best, though.”
29. “You’re such a sweet person for not letting me waste any more time on you. Thank you for showing me what a piece of garbage you are. Thank you, truly.❤️”
30. “Words can’t describe the pain I’m feeling right now. I used to think you were someone who would always stay by my side and make my life better, not ruin it. I gave you my all, but you went ahead and cheated on me. I don’t know what to say.”
31. “I don’t think I can go on like this. I’ve given you multiple chances to fix your ways and supported you, but you obviously either don’t care or are not boyfriend material. It hurts me to do this, but I’m breaking up with you.”
32. “I used to think every day about how lucky I was to have you in my life. I thought of you as a faithful, kind, and wonderful man. You’re the exact opposite of that. Funny, isn’t it? It’s over.”
33. “I support your ambitions to become a clown, however, I’m not going to stick around and let you mess with me. I don’t have time for that. Please lose my number and don’t ever contact me again. We’re done.”
34. “You know, I stuck around because I loved you and thought you would change your ways. I had faith in you, and I always supported you no matter what. To me, you were the only man in the world. But not anymore. Goodbye.”
35. “I wonder how your friends, family, and future partner would feel if they knew your true colors? I can’t wait to tell them what happened. Goodbye.”
36. “How nice of you to screw every woman within a 10-mile radius! You do know it’s over between us, right? You can find your stuff in my garbage. Or around town. Depends on what I feel up to.”
37. “The absolute last thing I expected from you was to cheat on me. I thought you cared for me and would never intentionally hurt me. I hope you have a good life, and good luck with whatever it is that you’re trying to do. Goodbye.”
38. “I never thought I would be saying these words to you, but I know you cheated. I know everything, and to be honest, I still feel dizzy. You used to be the only person able to cheer me up no matter how crappy my day was going. I thought you were the one, but now it’s clear you’re not. Don’t make this any harder than it is. I’m breaking up with you. I don’t intend to be your friend or anything like that. From now on, we’re strangers.”
39. “Since this is the last time we’re ever going to talk, I want to make a couple of things clear. You were the only person I have loved this way. I’m ending this relationship, and I don’t want you to contact me ever again. I do wish you a good life, though, just don’t bother me again.”
40. “Why did you do it, [his name]? Things were going great between us and you even introduced me to your family/friends. I guess this goes to show how easy it is for people to switch up. I will never be okay with this, so I’m breaking up with you. I’ll send you your stuff, and after that, please don’t attempt to contact me again.”
41. “I’m so disappointed. I thought you were a decent guy, not this immature, inconsiderate prick.”
42. “The audacity to ask for forgiveness…are you for real? So, let me get this straight. You cheated on me with who knows how many people, lied to me, and didn’t feel one ounce of remorse whenever you kissed me and told me you loved me? Have you lost your mind? We’re over.”
43. “I think it’s best we break up for good.”
44. “Well, I hope the nude you received was worth it because from now on you’re single. Don’t ever talk to me again in your life. Goodbye.”
45. “How can someone stoop so low is beyond me. I’ve always been by your side, no matter how tough things got. I was patiently waiting for you and showering you with all my affection. In my eyes, you were perfect, and finding out about this has completely changed my opinion. If you were unhappy with the relationship, you could’ve told me or at least broken up with me. But no, you intentionally hurt me; you chose to cheat on me.”
46. “Now it’s clear to me that you are not who I thought you were. You’re pathetic and a coward for doing that behind my back. I can’t stand to talk to you anymore. Let’s put an end to this relationship once and for all.”
47. “All this time we’ve been together and all the things we’ve gone through, but you do this? I thought you were a wonderful person and that I was lucky to have you. You’ve proven me wrong.”
48. “I should have listened when others told me to not get involved with you. I must have hallucinated the good in you, because you’re the most inconsiderate guy I’ve ever met. Don’t show yourself to me after today, [his name]. I don’t want to see you again.”
49. “I’m so glad we didn’t get more serious. You’re actually terrible. Lose my number, please.”
50. “When I first found out, I was shocked, but then everything started making sense. You’ve changed lately. You don’t say ‘I love you’ anymore, and when you kiss me, it feels emotionless. Things have changed between us, and instead of talking about them, you decided to just cheat on me, and that’s unforgivable. I wish you all the best, goodbye, [his name].”
Saying goodbye to a cheating boyfriend.
It’s difficult, but necessary!
Betrayal comes from people you love, and if a person is willing to hurt you, you can’t help but question their intentions.
Letting go of a cheating partner we truly loved and thought would change isn’t going to be easy, however, it helps us grow as people.
When saying goodbye to your now-ex, make sure to speak your mind—be genuine and leave nothing up for interpretation.
You need and deserve closure!