How to spot a good man on a dating site? 10 ways to find HIM!


Spotting a good man on a dating site should include more than just searching/judging based on your criteria and priorities.

A lot of men might have the same hobbies or interests as you but might not be good men.

To define more what to do, let’s take a look at the following analysis of dating apps and men:

What type of men use dating apps? Do good men use dating apps?

Not all men who use dating apps are looking for an opportunity to get laid.

There is a certain percentage of men that are using dating apps to find their soulmate.

  • According to this article by The Guardian, sometimes a man creates his profile on dating apps based on the criteria of being fun and casual.

And there are a lot of cases in which a man might seem unhinged, just by looking at his profile. Yet, he might be a good guy.

In the end aren’t we all trying to look fun and careless online so we can attract the opposite gender?!

For more information, check these 9 ways to spot a good man on a dating site:

1. His bio is clear and precise.

His bio is clear and precise

It tells a lot about a man’s character if he is very precise and genuine with his bio.

This doesn’t mean that his profile might not look a bit strange or that he shouldn’t seem like fun.

But, what I’m implying is that his bio is neat.

  • He might use humor to express his goals and aims in life and give you a glimpse of who he is.

    E.g. “I might look like I enjoy sports but being the best lawyer ever is my GOAL.”
  • He might also mention casually why he is using this particular app whether it is Tinder, Bumble, or OkCupid.

    Eg. “I swear I have been looking for my soul and mate here.”

Side note: You should also be aware that not all men are good at crafting a good dating profile. Thus, focus more on his overall profile.

2. He doesn’t open the conversation using sexual words.

The first impression is very important when it comes to online dating.

And to spot a good man on a dating site, you need to reflect on how he approaches you.

Even though on Bumble, you’re the one to start the conversation, still his way of responding is very important.

  • If he is the guy who seems chill, funny, and doesn’t sexualize you immediately as he interacts then his traits should not be ignored.
  • He is respectful during the conversation. Being respectful doesn’t mean that he won’t flirt with you or deliver what he’s looking for.

If he is a good man, he will balance his humor, aim, and his respect for you.

3. Do a background check on him.

To spot a good man on a dating site, you need to do a background check on him.

  • Start by searching his name on Google.
  • Then you can search for his name on Instagram and Facebook.
  • You can also use Swindler Buster to check if he has any hidden or other Tinder profiles.

In general, not all guys use social media, but if you can find more information about him online then he is more open to who he is and he won’t be a catfish.

4. He’s interested in getting to know you better.

If he’s a guy who is interested in you, your hobbies, your life and shares his opinion about it and his life, you’ve spotted a good guy.

  • You’ll notice that he asks specific but not very personal questions.
  • He makes sure to not cross your boundaries.
  • He will share his interests and hobbies and will ask you the same.
  • He tries to make the conversation interesting and compliments you but doesn’t try to sexualize the conversation.

5. He is not overly mysterious.

He is not overly mysterious

You will spot a good man on a dating site if he is consistent and doesn’t ignore or disrespect you.

  • If he isn’t interested or loses interest, he will let you know and won’t play mind games to make you chase him or feel small.
  • He doesn’t ignore you or your questions.
  • He doesn’t act like he is extra busy.
  • If he can’t talk to you a lot or doesn’t have enough time, he will let you know.

How he interacts with you depends also on how familiar he is with dating apps and how much experience he has with online dating.

6. His words are followed by his actions.

Even in real life, a good man is a man of word.

And to spot this on dating apps is not easy because sometimes life happens, they might get busy and the connection between you and him might change.

  • But, if you talk about doing an activity together and he’s consistent and doesn’t forget, he is interested in you and wants to show it.
  • He will try to talk to you almost every day even if it’s for just a couple of minutes.
  • You can easily verify the information that he shared with you such as his job position, his childhood friends, and so on.

7. You should look a bit out of your ideals.

You might have criteria when it comes to choosing a man on a dating site who will fit you.

Well, it’s not that your criteria or priorities are wrong but sometimes they don’t help you to spot a good man on a dating site.

You might have the same hobbies, interests, and maybe the same mindset as him but some elements in essence might connect you.

  • You need to change your way of searching. You should combine your criteria with something that may be out of your priorities.
  • Adapt your range. Just because he has the same hobby as you, it doesn’t necessarily mean he’s a good guy.
  • It doesn’t mean that you need to change your essential priorities. You change also your age preference for a year or so.

8. Check if he’s too good to be true.

If his profile is way too good and when he seems like he doesn’t have any red flags, that means that he might be a catfish.

A good man on a dating site won’t lie about his occupation or who he is just to seem dreamy.

Aman who has low self-esteem will create a profile that has no red flags but in practice is a major red flag.

  • His photos might look like they’re taken professionally.
  • His responses seem to be curated according to your personality info.
  • This means that he lacks personality and mirrors you just to get your attention.

9. He has a variety of pictures that show a glimpse of his life.

A good man who is using dating apps to find his partner will post different photos of his life.

He doesn’t post thirst trap photos or photos only of his body.

You can find in his profile photos with his family and friends.

His photos are taken on different occasions.

You can notice that his photos are taken when at parties, soccer games, or the office.

10. He’s authentic and his profile is outstanding.

He is authentic and his profile is outstanding

Spotting a good man on a dating site means spotting a trait that will catch your eye.

Something that will suit your personality.

  • A good man will post things that will define his personality. Something original and not generated.
  • You notice that he will post hiking pics but when you search about him, you’ll notice that he is part of a hiking club and likes it.
  • He uses his critical thinking and discusses different topics.
  • He mentions his friends and other people who have impacted him.

Sneakiest Red Flags to look at a man’s dating profile!

One of the main sneakiest red flags of a man’s dating profile is the lack of information.

A good man on a dating profile will add little but valuable information that will let you know bits of his life.

  • Low-quality photos and photos that don’t show his face.
  • When you’re having a conversation with him, he will act like you’re already dating or in a relationship.
  • He puts you on a pedestal right off the bat – complimenting you and the traits of your personality he hasn’t seen yet.
  • He will ask you personal questions and will put pressure on you to decide whether you like him or not.
  • He refuses to share personal information or twist it.
  • His viewpoints on women and society are highly judgemental.

Closing the curtains: How do you find a good man on a dating site?

The quest to find a good man on a dating site requires a bit more focus and effort and not taking things personally.

To spot a good man on a dating site is not an easy task because he might look good and be good on paper and not be like that in real life.

Yet, you can do a general check on him and talk to him for a while so you get a glimpse of who he is.

I advise you to ask more questions and check if his actions follow his words.

Take it step by step and don’t rush. You can find a good man on a dating site. And with enough patience, you will.


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