Dating sites are becoming increasingly popular, with millions of people using them—and succeeding—to find potential mates.
That sounds great and all, however, their effectiveness is also making them convenient platforms for cheating…
Because a lot of people have had a dating profile at least once in their life, it makes us wonder“Does my partner also use it?”
I’m going to put those suspicions to rest!
Here are 11 intelligent ways to find out if your partner is using dating sites!
1. Pose as your partner by logging in with their email or phone number to find out if they’re on dating sites.
Have you ever tried logging in with your username, email address, or phone number, but you accidentally messed up a character?
If so, I’m sure you’ve noticed that you couldn’t log in because the site didn’t recognize your log-in information, instead, it said something like:
“This account doesn’t exist.”
Let’s use this to our advantage to see whether your boyfriend is on dating sites, to begin with!
All you need to do is download the dating app/go on the site, enter your partner’s email address/phone number, and write down a random password.
If your partner doesn’t have an account, you should see something like:
“Incorrect email address/phone number.”
“An account with that email address/phone number doesn’t exist.”
On the contrary, if your boyfriend is on dating apps or sites using that specific email address or phone number, something like this will pop up:
So, what we’re essentially doing is posing as our partner by using their information to log in.
If the dating site or app can’t detect an account with the information you punched in, it means your partner doesn’t use the site/app.
Note that this works only if your partner isn’t using a different email address or phone number.
2. Search your partner’s name through the site’s URL to see if they have a dating profile.
This is a cool little trick that is super effective to know if your partner is on dating sites or not.
Find your partner’s profile by putting his/her name in the site’s URL.
For example www.tinder.com/@tim
For sites that are visible to Google search engines, this is a foolproof plan to find out if your partner has a dating profile.
If he/she has an account on, say, Tinder, the results of the people under that name will show up.
It’s worth giving it a shot for sure.
3. Use apps that are specifically designed to search for people on dating sites.
With how far technology has come, using third-party apps to search for people on dating sites has proven to be effective.
All you have to do is put down the name, phone number, email address, location, or whatever information the app requires.
Here are 7 carefully-picked sites that are effective and helpful.
- CheaterBuster (works only for Tinder);
Some of them require specific information such as phone numbers, email addresses, or names only.
However, the majority offer to find people based on all—or any—information, including images!
Amongst the sites mentioned, you can even find free alternatives, such as Epioes, which is an excellent email address look-up tool, and SocialCatfish, an overall great platform for finding profiles on dating sites.
Keep in mind that a lot of dating sites aren’t visible to public search engines and easy to find, so you may not get the desired results.
Nonetheless, chances are that you’ll find exactly what you’re looking for.
4. Search them and the dating site on Google to check if your partner is on dating sites.
Another cool trick to find out if your boyfriend is using dating sites is to search his name and the dating site on Google.
All we’ve got to do for this one is write the dating site’s URL and the partner’s name on the Google search bar!
Now, I’ve seen this method get a lot of attention, and to be honest I didn’t want to simply write it down without giving it a try myself.
I wanted to see what all that fuss was about, so I gave it a try.
- First things first, I went to Google.
- Then I wrote as instructed: site:datingsite.com name.
- And got the results.
I tried it out with a bunch of sites, and before I got too disappointed with this one, I tried Tinder as well. Surprise surprise!
You’ve got to try Tinder first, and if you don’t have the time, then avoid searching for other sites since I found it difficult to find any results.
If you’re looking for a free and easy way to find out if your spouse is on dating sites, then this is it!
5. Make an account and manually find your partner on dating sites.
If you don’t want to be all tech-savvy, you can take matters into your own hands and get to swiping!
This is yet another effective way to find out if your boyfriend is on dating sites for free!
All you have to do is
- Open an account on the dating site(s) you suspect your partner is using;
- Set your preferences that match your partner (gender, age, location);
- And start swiping or scrolling on the app until you find your partner!
This can be time-consuming and ineffective if your partner isn’t using their real identity. But what are the chances he’s switched up his whole identity?
Ironically enough, if you’re thinking of using this method, consider not using your name and pictures.
This process is well worth a shot and it’s not too far-fetched.
6. Ask your friends for help and tell them to keep an eye out!
If you have friends who frequent dating apps, consider asking them for help! This is yet another free method to find out if your partner is on dating sites!
Simply ask if they’re willing to help you out—which I’m sure they are—by keeping an eye out if your partner’s profile comes up.
Tell them how much you’d appreciate it if they helped you out with this.
Confide in them about how uneasy and restless the possibility of your s.o. online dating makes you feel.
Whenever they come across your partner’s profile, ask them to notify you, and share their link; if sharing isn’t possible, they can take a screenshot for you.
You might be thinking that the chances of your friends coming across your partner are thin, but that’s not necessarily true.
Your friends will be very helpful during this time of need!
7. Tell your partner a made-up story and see how they react.
Let’s take a break from all the technical stuff; how can human nature and behavior help us?
I’m talking about catching our special someone red-handed with a made-up story!
Maybe something like this:
“Babe, I just got off the phone with [friend’s name]. They’re really upset because they found Tinder on their partner’s phone. That sucks. What can I do to cheer them up?”
Casually strike up an innocent and normal conversation with your partner about something regarding a dating app.
You see, guilty people who aren’t telling the truth tend to exhibit certain behavior when they’re exposed to situations that have to do with their lies.
For example, if someone has lied about what grade they got, every time the topic of their grade gets brought up, they will feel visibly uncomfortable and will try their best to change the subject.
This is what we should be looking out for:
- A change in speech patterns, voice intonation, and mannerisms;
- Sudden blushing;
- Not saying enough/saying way too much;
- The non-use of first-person pronouns to not seem suspicious;
- Change of eye contact when the topic is brought up.
- Attempts to change the subject;
- Avoiding the topic altogether.
If your partner’s behavior looks something similar to this, chances are that he feels uncomfortable because the topic hits too close to home.
Their guilty conscience is physically and psychologically manifesting itself through patterns and behaviors; all of this is exactly what’s going to help us.
8. See what sites and apps have been used through your Wi-Fi connection.
This can be a bit tricky and difficult, but desperate times call for desperate measures.
- You can check the sites and apps that have been visited while somebody—your partner—was using your Wi-Fi connection.
However, unlike the other methods I’ve mentioned thus far, you’re going to need a different kind of help.
You can contact your internet service provider and request the information, or you can ask somebody who’s tech-savvy.
- Whatever sites we visit online—even in incognito mode—show up to our internet service provider.
So, if you and your partner, especially your spouse, are the only ones who have access to your Wi-Fi connection, you’ll easily be able to see whether any dating sites/apps have been visited.
9. Have a sincere talk with your partner.
If you want to be straightforward and fair with your partner about the whole situation, I recommend talking to them.
Whether you’re having these doubts out of curiosity or whether your partner is acting suspicious lately, one thing we know for sure: this is negatively impacting you.
Talk to your partner and express yourself; tell them about how you feel.
You can try saying something like this:
“Hey, baby. I want to talk about something. I was just curious, are you still on those dating sites? Not that I don’t trust you, I just need you to reassure me.”
Bring the topic up in a calm manner, let your s.o explain and express themself, and take what they’re saying into consideration.
Of course, I can’t guarantee that your s.o. is telling the truth; if you suspect your partner might be lying, then the other methods could be helpful.
10. Use reverse image search to find your partner’s dating profile.
You can also use reverse image search sites such as:
Reverse image search sites are designed to show the results of a photo’s source or even visually similar photos.
All you need to do is go to one of the mentioned sites, and upload your partner’s pictures—it’s as simple as that.
You’re not uploading the pictures anywhere online for people to see; you’re simply showing the site’s mechanics what or who needs to be found.
The site will find duplicate pictures, which account is using the picture, and even links!
Google offers a similar tool as well!
All you need to do is click that little camera button, upload the photo you want to use, and voilà!
You will find visual matches.
However, do keep in mind that it may not work for every dating site as some tend to be more secretive!
11. Toxic measures to find out if your partner is on dating sites: snooping around their electronics.
If this is your husband you’re trying to find out if he’s on dating sites, then you may have it easier to rely on toxic methods.
Some ways help you get what you want, however, they’re toxic and disrespectful.
They’re an invasion of privacy and our plan can backfire.
Everybody knows by now and is most likely trying to avoid taking these drastic measures, however, I can’t help but mention that:
– You can try checking your partner’s electronics.
Note that it should never come to this, but yes, one way to see if your boyfriend is on dating sites is to check their phone/computer.
- Look for any dating app icons. Look for the application that has been installed on your partner’s home screen/desktop.
While you’re at it, don’t forget to check the list of their installed apps in Settings; they could’ve hidden some apps away from the home screen.
- Check their browsing history. I’m sure you know what this means: access your partner’s browsing history on their devices.
There’s a chance that he hasn’t deleted or has forgotten to delete his browsing history, in which case, his activity will show up.
If he has, don’t be bummed out; if you notice unusual patterns of activity (e.g. if it says that he hasn’t visited any sites at all), that in itself is grounds for suspicion.
- Check Google’s autofill:
If your partner is smart, they’re going to delete their apps and browsing history.
However, that doesn’t matter if they have their passwords saved in Google’s autofill feature.
As we know and hate, we use different services and put different passwords, so, a lot of companies have come up with the autofill/password manager feature.
Simply go to Google, Settings, and click the Autofill feature. Go to Passwords and here we have—or have not—all the sites and passwords that are used to access them.
- Check what apps have been uninstalled on Android and iOS.
On your partner’s phone, check for any apps that have been deleted.
On Android: Google Play > profile icon >My Apps and Games (or Manage Apps and Device) > Manage >Installed > Not Installed.
On iOS: App Store and search for the dating app. If it says ‘Get’ next to the icon, then the app hasn’t been previously installed.
On the contrary, if there’s a little cloud with an arrow going down, then the app has been uninstalled.
- Check their notifications. Check his phone notifications and see for yourself whether he’s getting any from a dating site/app.
- Go through their emails. When people sign up using their email addresses, they usually get emails and notifications from the service they signed up for.
If your partner is using a dating site/app, it might show in his emails.
Pro tip: check Promotions, Bin, and Spam as well!
Be on the lookout for signs that tell your partner might be using dating sites!
Aside from technology, his behavior can also give cues regarding his activity on dating sites and other forms of infidelity!
Be on the lookout for any potential clues that tell you he’s engaging in unfaithful activities.
When people change, it usually shows in the way they act, talk, and overall engage with people close to them.
This way, you can know if your boyfriend is on dating sites or something else suspicious without even searching for him online.
Let’s have a look at some of the ways you can tell your boyfriend or partner is on dating sites:
– They act noticeably different and more distant.
When people who are in relationships partake in unfaithful activities, they are going to visibly change.
They act colder, more distant, confusing, and overall suspicious!
To us, it looks as if they have lost feelings or have grown distant; they’re just different from before.
If your partner has changed, and if he or she has a history of being on dating sites, then our suspicions could, unfortunately, be correct.
– They never give you their phone if you need/ask for it.
Has your partner become stingy with their phone?
They used to be cool with giving you their phone if you needed it; now, they protest hard and come up with excuses.
If so, there’s a big chance that they have dating apps installed and don’t want you to see them.
– Whenever you have their phone, they’re nervous and restless.
If our partners give us their phones, they act restless and anxious, and they try to rush us then they could be hiding something such as dating apps.
They are always there with us and monitoring what we do with their phone.
They try to retrieve their phones as soon as possible, leaving us little to no space to prevent any kind of potential “investigating”.
– All of a sudden, all their devices are locked.
Setting passwords for phones and computers is common; it protects our privacy and stops people from snooping around.
However, if your partner has just started setting passwords for their electronic devices, then something is fishy.
Dating apps could be in play here, and they don’t want you to catch them red-handed.
– They now put their phone on silent mode.
They do this to not raise any grounds for suspicions.
Specifically, it stops notifications and other alerts from being heard.
As we know, a lot of apps show us notifications (a lot of which are frequent and loud)—that alone would make anybody suspicious.
If your partner has just started putting their devices on silent mode, then they may be trying to hide something.
As nerve-wracking as this situation can be, we must always stay sharp and attentive.
A person who uses dating platforms while being in a committed relationship is not a small deal; it’s considered unfaithfulness, no matter how you look at it.
And with how terrifyingly easy committing adultery has become, it’s up to us not to allow ourselves to get disrespected.