Catching someone cheating online may or may not take a lot of work, depending on how mindful they’re being.
If your goal is to uncover online infidelity, know that there are multiple methods to do it (aside from spying on someone’s phone).
Before we talk about those methods, recognizing how online affairs start and for what reason will help you prevent it from happening in the future!
– How do online affairs start and what is the cause?
Online affairs are pretty flexible in the sense that they can start in literally any way; even the smallest spark can turn into a massive fire.
- It all starts with a person in a relationship texting another person or simply liking/commenting on their picture;
- Or they decide to sign up for popular dating apps like Hinge, Tinder, or Bumble in which they unintentionally meet a person they click with.
From then on, they go on to develop more profound feelings for one another.
It’s just as VeryWellMind says: though these interactions may be harmless at first, they become more severe with time.
– Causes include relationship problems, insufficient communication, fantasies, low self-esteem, and the list goes on.
So watch out! You may not want to come off as a “controlling” person, but by letting your s.o. cross your boundaries you’re only hurting your exclusivity.
Starting from actionable tips & tricks to breaking down and surveying a person’s behavior, this is how you can tell if they’re cheating online!
1. Catch them cheating online: text your partner with a fake profile.
Old but gold—message them from a pseudo account and flirt a little bit to see how they normally interact with people.
- Pick a fake name, different pictures (or heavily altered pictures of yourself), and make your profile look as real as possible.
You already know your partner well, so you know just what gets them—message them and after a while, pretend you’re intrigued by them.
Compliment them, show interest in their life, or spice things up—be absolutely irresistible to them to see if they crack.
If they play along and entertain what is essentially a complete stranger, then they are cheating online with other people.
2. If someone’s cheating, use spying apps (e.g. if they’re on dating sites).
There is software you can use that’ll show you who your partner is texting, and what exactly they’re saying.
Spying apps such as:
- Eyezy—a 1-month plan goes for $47.99;
- Mspy—$48.99 for 1 month;
- uMobix—1 month costs $49.99;
- ClevGuard—a 1-month plan goes for as low as $12.99.
If you pick a longer subscription (e.g. a 3-month or 1-year plan), then the price gets lower.
However, spying apps are worth it because users can view their partners’ social media, chats, call logs, online activity, keystrokes, contacts, pictures, etc.
Pick a well-trusted spying app, make an account, and pick a subscription that fits your needs.
- You need your partner’s phone to download the app and set it up—it’s quick and the app becomes invisible.
But, they’re an easy method of finding out a partner’s online infidelity.
3. Do a quick search on Swindlerbuster to see if they’re on Tinder!
According to a 2018 study, between 18 and 25% of Tinder users aren’t single.
Based on Tinder’s 75 million monthly users, that would round it up to 13-18 million cheaters on Tinder; using dating apps is considered cheating online.
If your partner’s behavior has led you to believe—or at least to suspect—that they’re cheating online, you’ve got to give this a try.
Use your spouse’s phone number or email on SwindlerBuster (and specify the supplementary info) to find out if they have a Tinder profile!
SwindlerBuster will find your significant other’s Tinder profile promptly with its outstanding technology—use it if you’re certain they’re on the platform!
4. Monitor your partner’s notifications—you might bust them online cheating!
Pay close attention to their notifications because they might receive a notification that will reveal everything.
Whenever you hear a notification sound, sneakily look over your partner’s shoulder (or view notifications on the Notification Center when they’re away).
- See if it came from a dating platform, if it’s a flirty text/comment/like, or a missed call from an ex/stranger.
If you see any notifications like that you’ll attain valuable proof they’re online cheating.
If you don’t have enough time and your partner has their notifications off, quickly enable all social media notifications through Settings < Apps.
6. Find out if they’re cheating online by proving their presence on dating apps.
You can:
1. Reverse image search their pictures.
If you’re looking to find a partner’s dating profiles for free, I recommend using reverse image search tools, such as:
- Google Lens;
- FaceCheck;
- SmalSEOTools, etc.
All you need to do is upload your spouse’s image on the app—carefully look around the results for any dating apps!
2. Search your partner’s name, nickname, username, and/or phone number on search engines.
If you didn’t know this trick, now you do!
Go to Bing, Google, DuckDuckGo (or other search engines) and type in your partner’s name/email//phone after the dating site’s URL.
It should look something like this: Tinder.com/@sebastian or Tinder.com/@seb.
3. Make a fake account and swipe until you find your partner.
Now, this is a time-consuming method only to be used if you’re 100% sure your partner is on a specific dating site.
Make a fake account and set your preferences based on your partner’s appearance, personality, and demographic information.
4. Use online, third-party services that help uncover hidden profiles.
There are online tools specifically used to uncover hidden profiles, such as dating ones:
- CheaterBuster and SwindlerBuster for Tinder;
- BuzzHumble for Bumble;
- PeopleLooker and SocialCatfish for all dating platforms (Tinder, Bumble, Grindr, Hinge, and more).
7. Do they overreact when you ask about a specific person? Analyze their reactions!
The term “online cheating” doesn’t only apply to someone who swipes on dating sites!
As explained by ChoosingTherapy, if a person who’s in a committed relationship with someone becomes emotionally, romantically, or sexually involved with somebody else, they’re committing adultery.
Based on this notion, online infidelity means sexting, sending nudes, flirting through messages, and saying the L-word with another person.
If you have witnessed any of this, don’t just sweep it under the carpet: ask them about it and be familiar with cheating reactions:
- Panicking and changing the subject;
- Making you feel bad for “spying” on their phone;
- Blushing and not being able to look at you head-on;
- Lying about who the person is and what the text meant (e.g. “I don’t know them. They probably sent it by mistake.”);
- Refusing to answer any questions.
Once a cheater notices they’re close to being caught, their mouth and body will stop obeying them; verbal/non-verbal clues are key here.
8. How to catch a partner cheating online by checking their phone?
Going through your partner’s mobile devices will help you determine if they’re cheating online because they’re most likely using their phone.
- You can either ask to check something on their phone or snatch it when they’re not present—which are both very wrong.
Once that is complete, here’s what to check:
- If there are any dating apps installed;
- The gallery app;
- Chats;
- Call logs;
- Social media accounts;
- Contacts, and basically anything that helps.
Though I don’t recommend this risky method, if you’re thinking of giving it a try, let me give you a heads-up.
The chances of a person realizing their phone has been tampered with are particularly high—especially if you’re not careful enough.
9. Peek at their emojis: online cheaters use particular ones.
Look at their recently-used emojis and see if there are any sexual/romantic ones that you’re unfamiliar with.
If your partner never sends you emojis of that nature, yet their keyboard is filled with emojis like, “🍆”, “🍑”, “❤️”, “😚”, “😍”, “🥵”, “🔥”, well, you get the gist.
They’re probably using them while texting with others online in a sexual manner.
Those emojis aren’t exactly the ones you use with friends or family, so that leads us to believe they’re using them with someone they’re involved with.
10. View their browser history—if you see dating sites (Tinder, Bumble, etc.), you’ve caught them!
See if your partner has visited any suspicious sites by viewing their browser history!
- On almost every browser, you can check what sites or other activities have been visited—this is usually found in Settings < History.
If your partner keeps their browser history, you will see if they’re cheating online; if they haven’t logged out of social media accounts, you will be able to get in.
This means that you’ll find out if they’re talking to an ex or a flirtatious stranger online.
11. Another way to gain access to a cheater’s socials is by checking their Password Manager features.
All you need to catch someone online cheating is their accounts’ passwords—this can be accomplished through Password Managers.
- These features are used to save passwords and log-in credentials so that logging in becomes more effortless.
See if your partner is using any of these features or even password-managing apps specifically developed for this task.
Search engines, for example, Google have features like this—they’re in Settings, Autofill, and Passwords (on Chrome for mobile you should see the icon).
On Microsoft Edge, go to Settings and Passwords.
On Firefox, click on Settings, then Privacy & Security, and finally go to Logins & Passwords—the list goes on!
9 signs to help you find out if someone’s online cheating!
Someone who is cheating exhibits online and offline signs that are a dead giveaway they’re up to no good.
And we’re going to talk about just that! Here are perhaps the 9 most revealing signs a partner is cheating online:
– A stony and unloving behavior is perhaps the strongest sign of online cheating.
One of the most common behavioral changes a cheater starts exhibiting are distance and coldness.
A partner who’s cheating online will change drastically; they’re distant and non-affectionate, either because they’re paying attention to other people, or they’re losing interest.
– They’re always on their phone.
I mentioned that people cheat with their phones, so it only makes sense that an online cheater will spend most of their time online.
- See if you can notice them constantly talking to another person even late at night or at other weird hours.
That’s their new-found source of entertainment and romance, so of course they’re going to want to spend most of their time there.
– An online cheater always interacts with strangers on social media.
- Sending friend requests to strangers online, liking inappropriate posts, leaving and replying to flirty comments, etc.
This is a huge, red flag
Due to how convenient it is, most cheating is done online and it all starts with small interactions (which later on become much bigger).
With a friend request, a like, or a comment, for example.
– They hide your relationship on social media.
They don’t mention the fact they’re in a relationship anywhere in their profile, making others believe they’re single.
They don’t interact with you in any way online, and God forbid they post a picture with you in their profiles (they might have deleted previous pictures).
They’re hiding you, and that’s seldom a good sign.
– Tell them you need to use their phone real quick.
And though it’s understandable not wanting anybody else to touch your phone, that’s not what I’m talking about.
- Ask them permission to check something on their phone—if they downright refuse, they could be keeping secrets
They protest as much as they can and even throw a tantrum once you get a hold of their phone.
– Do they get calls from…odd numbers?
That’s the only way I can put it—they get calls from people you don’t know or people with odd names.
- Shortened names (such as “Liz” for “Elizabeth”), symbols (emojis, numbers, etc.), or flat-out names you don’t recognize.
– Check their social media friends and see if you can notice a pattern.
I’m putting a bit more emphasis on this sign as it’s something that happens quite frequently.
- For instance, if you’re in a relationship with a man whose Instagram followers mainly contain women you don’t know, consider it a signal.
They may be keeping their options open; they want a “Plan B” in case your relationship fails.
– Try to unlock your partner’s phone: is the password different?
If a partner just started using passwords for their phone or PC, some investigation needs to be done (the same goes if they changed their password).
Especially if they never locked their stuff before.
A sudden change in this aspect is very alarming—it means that they have been trying to hide something from you recently.
– See if you can notice a pattern of them never answering calls and messages in your presence.
Or they leave the room whenever their phone receives a text or call.
If they rarely answer their calls while they’re with you, chances are they’re getting a call from someone they’re cheating online with.
Why should you attempt to catch an online cheater?
If you’re reading this, it probably means that you’re having new-found suspicions regarding a partner’s loyalty.
Don’t just brush your gut feeling off; have more faith in your judgment
In contrast to physical cheating, online cheating is more problematic to detect; someone could be doing it behind our backs and we would have no idea.
Without the proper care and determination, we could be letting our significant other get away with something they shouldn’t!