A guy who cheats can act either anxious or cocky. This all depends on how he feels about you and on his emotional intelligence.
Even if he is guilty and regrets what he has done, he might treat you badly just to camouflage how he’s feeling.
Or, he might become more affectionate out of a sudden which will make you more confused. It will definitely catch you by surprise.
So to decode his actions, here are 13 examples:
1. He might be uncomfortable when you try to be intimate.
When a guy cheats, you will notice that he doesn’t like to be intimate with you as before.
Or, he doesn’t like to try things in bed that both of you tried before.
As the researcher Melissa McTernan says, cheating is related to one’s personality.
If your partner cheats because he wants to try something new sexually but never discusses it with you, he will distance himself from you.
He might distance himself because he might feel embarrassed about his decision or has started slowly to lose his feelings for you.
2. He will be emotionally drained.
If you want to know which is the biggest sign that shows how a guy acts when he’s cheated, check how he’s feeling.
Usually, a guy who feels guilty for cheating will keep overthinking or might isolate himself.
Also, Freud describes guilt as a continuous inner battle.
This means that if he is unhappy with his decision, he will also act cold towards you.
- This doesn’t happen because he has lost feelings for you.
- On the contrary, he might be in a pit and doesn’t know how to communicate his feelings.
In this case, I advise you to try and be gentle with him and communicate whenever he’s ready. Be understandable but also let him know about your boundaries.
3. He treats you badly.
A guy who cheats might act like a jerk most of the time.
He might do it because he feels guilty or because he desperately wants to be with the other woman.
He uses three main strategies to do it:
- He will constantly state your flaws.
- He will make you and others around you think that you’re the problem.
- He tries to make you feel unwanted.
What I would suggest you do if you’re going through the same situation is to not let him control you or your emotions.
4. He becomes a gentleman suddenly.
There’s another side of the coin. Instead of being a jerk to you, he will act like a fine gentleman.
He thinks that he will camouflage what he did if he treats you like a queen.
If you have noticed earlier signs that he might be cheating on you then if he suddenly changes his behavior that means something.
- He might suddenly ask you to go on dates.
- Even though these dates might take place in your home the other woman won’t see you.
- He might suddenly give you tons of expensive gifts.
5. He starts to compare you with other women.
A guy acts very strangely after he cheats.
He might compare you to other women, especially with the type that is similar to the woman that he is cheating you with.
- If your hair is blonde, he then says that’s a lame color and it would be better if you dyed it brown.
- Or if she likes more sports than you, he will try to get you to like it and might say that you need to be more lively.
He does this because he thinks that maybe turning you into her will make him quench his desire.
6. He doesn’t feel enthusiastic about the relationship anymore.
I have been going through a similar experience in my early 20s. I started dating this guy (a senior in college) and I was a sophomore in college.
After he cheated, he slowly started to fall out of love with me.
He distanced himself from you step by step that you might not notice the change immediately.
- He starts by not cuddling that much with you;
- He makes fewer plans with you;
- His face won’t show the same enthusiasm after he meets you;
- He will contact you less and less.
7. He becomes very protective of his belongings.
When a guy cheats he will become defensive.
If you touch his clothes or his phone, he will overreact.
You might notice that he’s been doing this lately and whenever he gets a call or a text he just doesn’t talk on the phone or text.
E might even blame you for crossing his boundaries, something that he hasn’t done before.
8. He keeps hanging out with “friends” you don’t know.
Whenever someone calls him to hang out, he won’t give you many details.
He might either say someone from high school that you have never met or with colleagues that you don’t know.
He keeps going out more than before and he will never invite you to go and hang out with those people.
Even if you ask to go with him, he will come up with a mere justification.
9. He might end the relationship or encourage you to do it.
If he cheated because he lost interest or he just doesn’t want to admit that he has cheated, he will use reverse psychology.
- He would make you feel unwanted in this relationship or will act crazy as you decide to break up with him.
- This depends on how big his ego is and his pride. If you notice that he’s acting strange, then it’s time to use some tricks to make him admit his mistake.
This method helps you to find out the truth and choose what you want to do next with the relationship.
10. He doesn’t let you hang alone with his friends or even some members of his family.
When a guy cheats and someone finds out about it, he makes sure to not go around those people.
He is afraid that something might slip from their mouth and you might find out what the truth is.
You will notice that he will act weird when you’re around those people and he never leaves you alone.
Even if you’re talking with someone close to you, he will make sure that he’s around you and ready to intervene.
11. Suddenly, he becomes a workaholic.
When a guy cheats, he will drown himself to work or “work”.
The thing is that he will either lie that he’s working and staying up late or he’s drowning himself with work because he needs to distract himself from his mistake.
- Either way, he will try to spend less time with you and distract himself with work.
If you notice this then try to communicate with him and ask him if something is wrong.
According to his reaction, you will be able to check whether he has cheated or not.
12. He’s pissed when you ask any type of question.
You can notice that his mind wanders when he gets mad at you for even asking the easiest and simplest questions.
The questions that piss him off won’t be only regarding his actions or where he has been but even if you ask him to eat a certain food, he will overreact.
- He will be pissed because he uses that as a defensive mechanism.
- He will try to act tough because he thinks that by doing that, you won’t answer other questions.
In this case, it’s better to give him some time on his own, try to give him some space but communicate with him later on.
13. He becomes very anxious.
If he’s feeling guilty or the other woman is pressuring him, he will become very anxious.
- You might notice that he loses sleep or might get up during the night and can’t fall asleep.
- He might keep going to the other room either to think or just lie down there so he won’t be in the same room as you.
- Whenever the phone rings, he panics and yells at everyone who touches his phone.
Now, if you are going through the same situation, stay calm. Don’t ask him what’s wrong during night time.
When you find the perfect moment to talk with him tomorrow morning or during lunch, ask him if you can do anything to help him.
How to react and cope after you notice signs above?
If you notice these changes in his behavior and prove that he’s cheating then you need to calm down and reflect.
As the Director of Coaching Melody Oseguera claims the cheater isn’t always happy when they cheat or when they’re part of an affair.
~Thus, the first step that you should take is to gather as much evidence as you can.
Check if he’s talking to someone else on WhatsApp or other social media.
Make sure that while gathering evidence you don’t cross his boundaries because he might sue for that later on.
~Open the conversation when you think that it’s the proper moment.
Talk to him when all of you are feeling relaxed and don’t try to accuse him immediately.
~Try to find common ground.
If he has cheated then try to find a middle way to fix this situation.
To fix the situation doesn’t mean that you should be evil to him and use no contact.
If he doesn’t cooperate then you can choose to turn your back and focus on yourself.
Closing the curtains!
After cheating a guy can try to either reconcile or distance himself from you.
If he has already developed stronger feelings for the other woman then he might try to convince you that the relationship isn’t working.
He will either mistreat you or try to convince you that he loves you the most until he settles with the other person.
How a guy acts after he cheats depends on his character and how able he is to control and manage his emotions.
Still, don’t give up, and never blame yourself for this type of situation.
Stay calm, surround yourself with people who warm your heart, create boundaries, and choose You!
Best of luck.